Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Judges say parents go too far if the blow leaves a handprint or bruising.
A parent who strikes a child in the face hard enough to leave fingerprints and bruising has used excessive force and can be put on a list of abusive parents, a state appeals court ruled Tuesday. In their 16-page opinion, judges Victor Ashrafi and Douglas Fasciale reviewed two other cases in which a parent who slapped a teenager and another parent who struck her child on the shoulder were found not to have used excessive force. But in this case, the judges held that striking the child in the face, and with enough force to leave a mark the following morning, crossed the line. "Slapping the face of an eight-year-old child with sufficient force to leave a hand imprint and cause bruising goes 'beyond what is proper and reasonable,'" the court …
Monday, February 6, 2012
New book out Tuesday explains why American parents should emulate the French. What do you think?
A just-published Wall Street Journal article describes French toddlers as sitting contentedly in their high chairs, waiting for their food, or eating fish and even vegetables when out at restaurants to eat. There is no shrieking or whining. And there is no debris around their tables. What gives? In an article adapted from Bringing Up Bébé: One American Mother Discovers the Wisdom of French Parenting, to be published Tuesday by the Penguin Press, author and former Wall Street Journal reporter Pamela Druckerman explains why the French are able to raise happy, well-behaved children without all the anxiety experienced by American parents. She says that French parents are involved with their kids without being obsessive, noting that "while some…
Friday, January 27, 2012
Advice for a parent of a child with newly diagnosed food allergies, from a mom who's been there.
A friend referred a mom of a child newly diagnosed with food allergies to me. The mom was understandably scared and confused with the news of her child's diagnosis, and my friend thought I might be able to answer some questions about how to cope. My heart went out to this woman, as I so clearly remember being in her shoes almost six years ago. Sitting numb in the allergist's exam room with my 12-month-old son, as the nurse propped open a portable DVD player and played an instructional video on the proper use of an epi-pen, I longed to go back just one hour when, as far as I knew, my son had no food allergies. I wanted to hug this woman. I told her that the overwhelming fear that everything in your pantry and fridge holds the potential …
Thursday, January 12, 2012
Looking for the root cause of a shift in attitude.
I'm frustrated. It goes hand-in-hand with parenting, some would say, but right now I'm particularly frustrated.
Over dinner my oldest casually mentioned she'd been called into guidance again because a teacher was worried she wasn't acting herself. My husband and I exchanged a worried look and then launched a barrage of questions. What? What do you mean not acting yourself? What's going on? And what's this again business? Of course rapid-fire questioning is not a way to get a tween to talk, but in our panicky and concerned state it was all we could think to do. The child looked, in turn, miserable and then angry as she blurted out, "I hate school okay! I just hate it!" I know it's not unusual for children to claim they hate school but my…
Saturday, December 31, 2011
The fallacy of assuming one negates the other.
My daughter's Christmas list this year was further proof of her burgeoning teen-ness. Gone were the American Girl dolls and other toys that used to dot her list and in their place were requests for electronics, clothes and shoes, and makeup. Not once looking at her list did I worry that my daughter was going to fall victim to a society where her looks are valued above all else and she'd rather win America's Top Model than a Nobel Prize. The author Lisa Bloom in her provocative article "How to Talk to Little Girls" opines that in order to avoid our daughters feeling that their self worth comes from their looks we should only talk to them about books, and intellectual pursuits and avoid complimenting them on their looks at all cost. If…
Saturday, November 26, 2011
Skeptical mom loses some of her skepticism.
I recently read a memoir in which the author recounts meeting Don Henley of the Eagles as a kid. She loved the Eagles and wanted nothing more than to tell him so. He was a huge jerk, which devastated her. I have worked with my fair share of famous people; some of whom are lovely and some of whom are horrible. A close friend is well known for a role she had on a teen show years ago. Once while we were shopping at a super hipster store, I was shocked when a tattooed, pierced, bearded shop assistant ran over and gushed over her, telling her how much he loved watching her on the show and asking for an autograph like a 12 year-old girl. She smiled graciously, thanking him and signed his autograph. Later she told me that is why she’s never …
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Just because you've fulfilled your legal obligation, should you ignore your moral obligation?
The stories of students rioting at Penn State over the firing of football coach Joe Paterno surprised me. Rioters claimed he did nothing wrong, but I disagree - by doing the bare minimum, he turned a blind eye to repeated child abuse. In 2002, Mike McQueary, a graduate student and member of Paterno’s coaching staff, allegedly witnessed Jerry Sandusky sodomizing a young child in the Penn State locker room showers. Rather than stop the assault, he left, waiting until the next day to report what he saw to Paterno. Paterno in turn reported it to Athletic Director Tim Curley and Gary Schultz, vice president for finance and business who oversaw the campus police. Rather than investigate the allegations or find the child involved or call the …
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
Clinging to the time that's left of a fleeting childhood.
I watched my son maneuver his Halloween costume up stairs with difficulty while trick-or-treating. I hadn't banked on stairs when creating it, nor had I banked on low hanging branches, so I found myself running up to either lower his balloon or help him raise his basket or both as he went through our neighborhood. It took some convincing to get his buy-in for my costume idea- Hot Air Balloon Pilot, the clencher was allowing him to choose the color of his balloon (orange). I know the days of me choosing his costumes are almost over, so I am glad that so many people we encountered were so enthusiastic about this years', maybe it will buy me another a year or two of creative input. Where my daughter has eased into growing up in a manner …
Sunday, October 30, 2011
The Pixies' Kim Deal proves my son wrong.
My husband and I saw the Pixies play at the Wellmont theatre on Thursday for the first gig of their tour. I’ve loved this band since they first emerged in the late '80s; their music was the soundtrack to the end of my high school and all my college years. There were fans our age along with much older and much younger fans in the audience. The most striking thing to me was the number of adults who had brought young kids to the show. On either side of us were kids close to our kids ages. I asked one mother what prompted her to bring her son and she told me that besides her having played their music around her son since he was small, she wanted him to see Kim Deal, the bassist for the band. “I wanted him to see that female musicians can …
Friday, October 14, 2011
Make Your Mark week aims to show kids that 'doing good' feels good.
Next week generationOn, the kid division of the Points of Light Institute, is implementing 'Make Your Mark Week,' (Oct. 16-22) a movement aimed at inspiring kids to volunteer and make an impact in their communities. They hope to inspire young people to focus on issues that matter most to them and to show them that small acts and service projects can add up to make a big difference. Kids and parents can visit their website to get great service ideas for a variety of issues. We live with an ever-increasing number of distractions and pressures. Our kids juggle school, after-school activities and enrichment, all of which in many cases, are geared toward getting them into a good college so they can ultimately be productive members of society. …
Sally McBride
5:15 pm on Monday, April 16, 2012
Seems like this is "joe's" only comment. Patch, can you trace back his ip address and delete his account and all of the other accounts "he" posts from? more ›